You Can't Make This Up
NEW YORK - resident Kathy Evans brought humiliation to her friends and family when she set a new standard for stupidity with her appearance on the popular TV show, 'Who Wants To Be A Millionaire.' Evans, a 32-year-old wife and mother of two, got stuck on the first question and proceeded to make what fans of the show are dubbing 'the absolute worst use of lifelines ever.' After being introduced to the show's host Meredith Vieira, Evans was posed with a typically easy initial $100 question. The question was: 'Which of the following is the largest?'
A) A Peanut
B) An Elephant
C) The Moon
D) Hey, who you calling large?
Immediately Mrs. Evans was struck with an all consuming panic as she did not readily know the answer. 'Hmm, oh boy, that's a toughie,' said Evans, as Vieira did her level best to hide her disbelief. 'I mean, I'm sure I've heard of some of these things before, but I have no idea how large they would be.' Evans made the decision to use the first of her three lifelines, the 50/50. Answers A and D were removed, leaving her to decide which was bigger, an elephant or the moon. However, faced with an incredibly easy question, Evans still remained unsure. 'Oh! It removed the two I was leaning towards!' exclaimed Evans. 'Darn. I think I better phone a friend.' Mrs. Evans asked to be connected with her friend Betsy, who is an office assistant. 'Hi Betsy! How are you? This is Kathy! I'm on TV!' said Evans, wasting the first seven seconds of her call. 'Ok, I got an important question. Which of the following is the largest? B, an elephant, or C, the moon. 15 seconds hun.' Betsy quickly replied that the answer was C, the moon. Evans proceeded to argue with her friend for the remaining ten seconds. 'Betsy, are you sure?' said Evans. 'How sure are you? Duh, that can't be it.' To everyone's astonishment, the moronic Evans declined to take her friend's advice. 'I just don't know if I can trust Betsy. She's not all that bright. So I think I'd like to ask the audience,' said Evans. Asked to vote on the correct answer, the audience returned 98 percent in favor of answer C, 'The Moon.' Having used up all her lifelines, Evans then made the dumbest choice of her life. 'Wow, seems like everybody is against what I'm thinking,' said the too stupid to live Evans. 'But you know, sometimes you just got to go with your gut. So, let's see. I'm going to have to go with B, an elephant. Final answer.' Evans sat before the dumbfounded audience, the only one waiting with bated breath, and was told that she was wrong, and that the answer was in fact, C, 'The Moon.'
Caution...they walk among us!
posted by Grannyann at
4:55 PM
5 Comments:
Ha!!!!! "Caution...they walk among us!"
What an amazing story. I can only hope she's not a school teacher or a psychiatrist :-)
xo
Oh my word!!! It is scarey - they do walk among us.
That's hilarious! And yet so sad, especially because only 98% of the audience answered 'The Moon'.
The other 2% must have been Mrs. Evans' relatives?
Yeah, I was thinking the same thing...what on earth was wrong with the other 2% also?
It goes with my theory that there are Aliens here posing as us. ha (Maybe on their planet, there are no elephants and they didn't learn about them before coming to earth?) ha
I heard Judge Judy say on her show that every third person you come in contact with is an idiot. This is hilarious.
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